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As a reluctant HIV-positive activist, I am often bombarded with the secret misgivings of closeted HIV-positive men from across the country.

No matter how much or how little they know about HIV or how short or how long they have been living with the virus, there seems to be only one singular concern on their mind: They are afraid of being rejected by a potential love interest because of their HIV status. Someone is going to shut you down before they get to know you because you are living with HIV.

Whether you are HIV-positive or not, the first step to having a healthy outlook on love and relationships is to realize that you are happier by yourself than miserable with the wrong man.

Everyone gets rejected, whether you are HIV-positive, too short, not short enough, too quiet, too loud, a slob, a clean freak, too attached to your mom, not attached enough, whatever. You most likely have voided a relationship for a reason as shallow as an HIV status before, and you will most likely do it again.

You should be with him because he truly makes you happy and you don't have a problem with walking away if that ever changes.You think that you can charm someone with your personality and dazzle your date with your dashing good looks so much that they just won't be able to let you go, HIV status be damned.You think maybe if you wait a couple of beats before disclosing your status, they will get to know you and look past your HIV symbol.You should reject the notion that you aren't deserving of happiness, love and nothing less than fireworks.Most importantly, you should reject the notion that anyone worth your time could possibly reject you for being HIV-positive.

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